Above: Ellie Kate's heart beat.
Now, it is my turn to be a mom, and the more I feel Ellie Kate grow inside of me, the more I fall in love with her. When the hubs and I were dating, we talked about our future together. It was both of our hearts' desire that I could stay home with our children.
Above: Ellie Kate's lungs, heart and spine.
So, then, it would seem obvious that I would stay home when Ellie comes. But I can honestly say, that it has not been quite so simple for me to come to this decision. I really enjoy what I'm doing and love being on staff at Life Centers. In a short 6 months, I've grown to love the women that I work with... volunteers and staff. I admire the women who give their time to be a part of this ministry. Wisdom and grace abounds, and clearly, God is in control.
Time and again, a woman enters our doors saying she wants to volunteer. She doesn't know why, but she can't escape the Holy Spirit tugging on her heart. As we talk, she tears up, surprising herself with this emotion. I know exactly how she feels because that was me when I came to offer my abilities to volunteer last spring.
And time and time again, a woman enters our door thinking she's there for a quick pregnancy test. And yet, she will leave saying that she knows that she was supposed to come in, and she feels God's tugging on her heart. He's pursuing her.
My view on abortion and Life Centers has changed quite a bit since I began volunteering. Before, I felt it was import to change the laws, which is still important. And when I first came to volunteer, I thought it was all about saving the lives of unborn babies, which is also still important.
And yet, there is a woman who walks through our door, and she has fallen between the cracks of society. She's never the same but often similar in one way.... if she would just surrender to Christ, and follow His boundaries of love, and build a foundation of the Word, her life would forever be changed in a positive way. Everything would fall into place. Everything may not become perfect or exactly fixed, but she would be in a better place to face her decisions.
Above: Ellie Kate's spine, head and hand (facing down).
Just yesterday, I was counseling a very young girl, and I asked her, "Why do you think that when you come in for a pregnancy test, I would start talking with you about Jesus Christ?"
She was undecided as to whether or not she would parent or abort her possible pregnancy. And that is where being pregnant has become an amazing part of my ministry. I pointed to my stomach and told her, "I don't do anything to make my baby grow. Sure, I eat and sleep, but I would do that anyways to take care of myself. I never have to tell my little girl, 'Don't forget to grow your fingers today. Or today, it's taste buds' turn to form.'" Life is a miracle. No matter the circumstances.
Above: Ellie Kate at 21 weeks.
Sharing God's Truth with others can only have one effect. It makes me want to walk closer with God. By telling of His love and truth, I am reminded of how God's love and truth abounds. When telling another woman how she can keep Christ in the center of her life, I am challenged to do the same in my life. It is how God created us. By sharing, we grow and so does our compassion for others.
If you're reading this and feel God's Holy Spirit tugging at your heart, I want to encourage you to get involved. Get involved in a ministry that is near to your heart. Take a risk and donate some time to a ministry like Life Centers.
Above: Ellie Kate being very lady-like with her legs together. (bent at the knee)
I know this is easy for me to say, seeing as I don't have any children consuming my attention at this moment. And that brings me back to my (our --the hubs and I) decision. I am going to resign my post as co-director at the NE center mid-March. But once I've gotten through the first few months of being a new mom with an infant, I hope to remain involved somehow. I don't know how, but I serve an amazing God who will light the path.
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